


Tell Me What It Says!

by ShieldEcho



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Character Study, Discussions of Adult Topics, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:27:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24144373
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShieldEcho/pseuds/ShieldEcho
Summary: When Ira first brings up the idea that there might be a traitor in their midst, Gula tells him about the Lost Page immediately.
Kudos: 6





	Tell Me What It Says!

**Author's Note:**

> Alternatively titled “Five Kingdom Hearts Characters Aged Teenager To Maybe Adult Have A Round Table Discussion About Their Various Kinks.”

“There's a traitor among us,” said Ira, stepping away from the window and approaching the round table where the other foretellers were all sitting, or in Aced's case standing beside.

“Are you certain?” said Invi. “What proof do you have?”

Ira held up his hand and conjured an image of a dark Chirithy.

“I found this sniffing around.”

“Is that...a dark Chirithy?” asked Ava.

“Is that a Nightmare?” cried Invi, standing up.

“It's not me!” barked Aced, very convincingly.

“There's an easy way to solve this,” said Gula from where he was sitting perched on the round table. “If we all summon our Spirits, we'll know.”

“Unfortunately, there our countless wielders in our unions,” said Invi, who was suddenly sitting again. “It would be easy for any of us to summon a Chirithy that isn't a Nightmare. I'm afraid that your suggestion won't help us get to the bottom of this.”

“Yeah, in that case,” said Ava, standing and placing her hands on the round table, “who's to say that the Nightmare you saw belongs to one of us? It could belong to anyone in our unions.”

“That's highly unlikely—”

“Wait, is this about the Lost Page?” said Gula suddenly.

“The what now?” said Invi, Aced, and Ava in unison.

“So it's you who has it!” Ira cried, rounding on Gula.

“It's a page the Master gave me,” said Gula, addressing the other three at the table. “It doesn't exist in any of our Books.” He turned to Ira. “So you figured it out, huh? Guess it wasn't that hard, the page before does kind of trail off at the end but I can promise you the sentence ends with the words 'of it.' Not that exciting, really.”

“The Master gave it to you?” said Ira, his demeanor visibly changing.

“Yeah, I had a feeling you'd think whoever had the Page would've ripped it out deliberately for themselves,” said Gula. “Turns out it was the Master.”

“What's on it,” said Ira, his voice low and dangerous. Gula blinked.

“I mean, I'm not going to tell you what it actually says—”

“And why not!?” Aced cut him off, slamming his fists onto the round table so hard that it shook.

“Because the Master specifically told me not to,” Gula replied calmly. “He didn't say anything about not giving a vague description, though.”

“So give us this vague description, then,” said Aced impatiently.

“Wait, I'm not sure—”

“Not now, Ava,” said Ira, waving his hand, and Ava fell silent immediately. “Gula?”

“Right.” Gula cleared his throat. “The Lost Page details the day that you all find out what the Master's into. Sexually. The weird stuff.” There was a pause as the other foretellers stared at him, and he shrugged. “The Master doesn't want you to kinkshame him and tasked me to help him put it off as long as possible.”

“...But why did he trust you with this information!?” Aced demanded.

Gula gave him a look.

“I'm into feet, who the fuck am I to judge,” he said.

“Okay now I'm sickly curious about the Master,” said Invi.

“Gula, you need to tell us,” said Ira. “Or at least tell me; I'm the leader now that the Master's gone and I need to know everything.”

“Yeah, sure, that's the reason you want to know,” said Gula, rolling his eyes under his leopard mask. “Sorry, boss, but this is my role and I'm sticking to it.”

“Which means we should leave him alone,” Ava spoke up. “We all need to follow the Master's teachings, and if the Master didn't want Gula to tell anyone then we shouldn't force him.”

“Not to mention it's just a dick move to out someone's sex stuff before they're ready,” Gula pointed out. “Especially if they've asked you not to.”

“Thing is, it can't be all that bad,” said Aced. “I mean, we're all furries here anyway, right?”

“I'm a scalie but I get your point,” said Invi.

“I'm not a furry!” Ava protested. “Everyone else had an animal motif and I just think foxes are cute, I didn't know that was what this actually meant! I just didn't want to feel left out!” She wrung her hands. “Is...Is that what everyone thinks? Should I not wear the mask anymore...?”

“Are you really that uncomfortable?” asked Invi.

“I'm like fifteen at best,” said Ava miserably. “Frankly, I still think sex stuff is gross and scary and I try not to think about it much, so I haven't bothered to figure out what I like yet.”

“Praise kink, calling it now,” said Aced.

“Aced, lay off,” Invi snapped. “She just pointed out she's underage and besides, she could be ace for all we know.”

“But Gula's the same age roughly maybe it's not clear!” Aced pointed out.

“Wow, it's almost like people are different or something,” said Gula acidly. “I was curious about sex so I looked stuff up and found out what I was into. Ava's not ready yet and if she never is that's fine too.”

“...Come to think of it, are the three of us even of age?” Invi asked, looking over at Ira and Aced.

“Who knows,” said Ira. He turned to Gula. “If we tell you what our various kinks are, will you tell us about the Master?”

“I mean, no, but if you feel you must,” said Gula, his arms crossed. “I'll tell you what it's not, anyway, how 'bout that.”

“I think we can accept those terms,” said Invi.

There was silence for several minutes as everyone waited for someone else to speak first.

“...I'm into edging,” Ira finally admitted, realizing that he as the leader might as well go first. “And overstimulation.”

“Thought you'd be into horse cocks,” laughed Aced.

“Thought you'd be into large hairy gay men,” Ira shot back.

“You take that the fuck back right now!” Aced shouted, suddenly angry again.

“Wait, you're not into bears?” said Gula, genuinely surprised.

“Of course not!” Aced yelled. “I'm straight!”

Everyone stared at him. There was silence for several moments.

“...There are straight people in Kingdom Hearts?” said Ira at last. “I thought everyone was bi at minimum.”

“Still identifying as ace at present,” said Ava.

“Which is still not straight,” Gula pointed out.

“Touché.”

“I like light bondage,” said Invi, getting them back on topic. “Nothing too complicated, and there can't be a gag involved, how're you supposed to use safe words otherwise.”

“Hand signals?” suggested Gula.

“I was having a rhetorical conversation,” said Invi. “I prefer to say when I'm uncomfortable.”

“Ah.”

They lapsed into silence again, one by one turning to Aced, who was standing with his arms crossed, refusing to look at any of them.

“Well, Aced?” Gula finally prompted. “Do you want to hazard a guess as to what's on the Lost Page or don't you?”

Blushing and turning away, Aced mumbled something under his breath.

“Sorry?” said Gula, putting a hand to his ear. “Didn't quite catch that, bud!”

“...Vr...”

“One more time, pal, you can do it!”

“VORE!” Aced yelled. “VORE! I'M INTO VORE! YOU HAPPY NOW!?”

Everyone but Ava face-palmed. Or did the best they could considering most of their faces were obscured by giant fucking animal masks.

“Of course you would be...” said Ira, shaking his head.

“I don't understand half of what you're talking about and I don't think I want to,” said Ava.

“You should follow your instincts,” said Invi, shaking her head.

“More than the Master, all this makes me wonder what Luxu's into,” muttered Ira.

“Roleplay,” said Gula.

“That somehow makes way too much sense and I don't know why,” said Invi.

“Anyone else thinking watersports for the Master?” said Aced. “It's the only thing I can think of that he'd be ashamed of, especially compared to the rest of us.”

“It's not watersports,” said Gula. “And it's not any of ours, either.”

“Then what the hell is it!?” Aced shouted, slamming his hands on the round table again.

“I already told you, I'm not telling you.”

“Listen here, you little shit—”

“STOP!” cried Ava, slamming her hands on the round table one last time. “The Master said not to pry so let's not pry! Since it's written in the Book we're gonna find out one day anyway, whether the page was torn out or not right? If the Master wanted to delay the inevitable then let's give him a few more weeks or months of peace!”

“...I can accept that,” said Ira.

“Me too,” said Invi.

“...Fine,” said Aced, turning away, leaving the room and slamming the door behind him.

“...So what're we gonna do about that dark Chirithy?” asked Invi at length.

“Be more involved with our unions than literally not at all?” Ava suggested.

“Nah, that sounds like effort.”

“I need a shower,” muttered Ira. “These robes are so sweaty, why do we even wear them...” He left after Aced, closing the door gently behind him.

“A shower's not the worst idea after that conversation,” said Invi, rising and following Ira out the door, leaving Gula and Ava at the round table.

“...The Master likes cuddling,” said Gula once he was sure no one else was in earshot.

“W-What?” said Ava. “So he...gets turned on by...?”

“Nope, he just really likes cuddling. In the afterglow, when there wasn't any sex involved, whatever, whenever.”

“...But why would we kinkshame him for that?”

“Don't think we would,” said Gula, jumping down from the table. “He just wanted us to get to know each other better, and maybe ourselves as well.”

“...So he ripped out a page of our super important future-telling Book for the sake of a team-building exercise?”

“Seems that way.” Gula adjusted his robes slightly. “And it worked out so well, didn't it.”

“...I'm beginning to think that the Master might've been full of shit,” Ava said slowly.

“You're just getting that now!?”


End file.
